I am passionate about communication styles but seek guidance in finding my own. Regarding confrontation, I am always confident that it will work out, but when it comes to talking, I can’t muster up the courage to be vulnerable and say what’s on my mind. If this sounds like you, or you struggle in other aspects of communication, you may need to learn about communication styles. This blog post is all about communication styles and how to learn about which ones are important for you.
Why Communication Styles Are Important
Communication styles are essential in all aspects of your life: personal, academic, workforce, romantic, friendships; the list goes on. You can never be too careful with understanding and choosing a communication style.
It is a great way to deepen relationships and live happier lives. Not only does it help you understand yourself, but understanding other people’s communication styles is crucial to handling conflict and ensuring you take the right approach when facing troubling times.
Once you learn your own, you can also understand how to communicate your ideas and live more confidently as you illustrate your thoughts to others. This will also allow you to take agency in fostering a safe and positive environment for yourself and those in your life.
There are a few different types of communication styles, and this blog post will go through all of them and help you decipher which ones you are drawn to the most. Not only this, but it will also give you ideas on which ones to try out.
Styles of Communication
According to my research, there are around five commonly identified communication styles. I am not a doctor nor a certified expert in this field, so please do your research when looking at communication styles. This is meant to be a simple introduction for your interest 🙂
Aggressive Communication Style
Those with an aggressive communication style tend to overpower conversations and disregard the needs or thoughts of others. They usually have an intimidating hold over a conversation and interrupt others while talking. It is expected to see them react before thinking and letting their feelings take over the conversation. They also might be defensive when approaching a conversation and quickly helping you with your needs.
An aggressive communicator usually starts sentences with “I” a lot, talk loudly, and take no interest in the other person. They tend to befriend people who are passive communicators.
Passive Communication Style
Passive communicators prefer to avoid conflict and want to avoid being the centre of attention. You will often see them having an easygoing attitude and not expressing their desires or need to keep peace. They do not like conflict and would rather have someone else decide than themselves.
Passive-Aggressive Style
Passive-aggressive communicators are a mix of passive and aggressive communicators! You guessed it. This kind of person is inactive on the surface and seems as if they do not have any preferences, but in reality, they will manipulate the conversation to benefit themselves.
Manipulative Communication Style
A manipulative communicator will use strategies to get the conversation to go as they please. It is harder to identify, but once you discover this, you can realise that they phrase sentences to allow situations to work out in their favour.
Assertive Communication Style
While an assertive communicator are also good (confident) at being direct and honest about their feelings, like an aggressive communicator, they know how to communicate their feelings within others’ boundaries. They remain polite and respectful while ensuring everyone in the room is comfortable. This is the perfect balance of keeping your own needs and maintaining others.
Quizzes to Help You
Many quizzes online will tell you about your communication style if you are curious. This is an easy way to identify what strategy you most like to use if you are struggling to choose it yourself.
This one by Leadership IQ or VeryWell Mind is another option.
Communication Styles in the Workplace
You will often encounter all of the abovementioned communication styles in the workplace and your personal life. Figuring out communication styles for the workplace is especially important as it can affect how your team works and create a more inclusive environment than before.
For instance, if you recognise that your superior at work has an aggressive communication style, you can understand that you must be calm when addressing them and know they like to control conversations.
On the other hand, if one of your colleagues has a more passive approach to conversations, you can create a space where they feel more comfortable sharing their ideas.
The workplace is the most appropriate place to utilise communication styles as you constantly work around a team and must understand why people react a certain way. As mentioned earlier, learning about communication styles can help mitigate conflict and provide you with a toolkit to address difficult situations adequately.
How to Adapt
While these are great insights, how do you change how you discuss ideas or problems? How do you ensure that when you speak to others with different styles, you can feel comfortable in the conversation?
If you encounter aggressive communicators, remember they like dominating the conversation. To allow yourself to feel comfortable and them too, be sure to remain calm and collected. This way, they will realise that you are not a threat and there is no reason to dominate the conversation. If you feel that the conversation is becoming too personal, know that it is your right to walk away and take some time before returning to the conversation.
If you are with a passive-aggressive communicator, ask them for clear instructions as to what they want rather than to have to keep guessing how they feel. Remind them that you both are on the same page; you want to figure out the issue together and find a solution. Once they realise this, you can ask them to be honest so that you can move forward.
Passive communicators like to be easygoing, make fewer decisions and avoid conflict. However, you must make them feel comfortable to hear their feelings truly. Some suggest cracking jokes or asking them how they think, leaving space for their opinions. This is key to creating a safe environment for a passive communicator.
Although manipulative communicators may be challenging to identify, if you feel that there is a difference between what they say and their actions and that they are only doing things to fit their agenda without considering other’s feelings – then you know that this is a manipulative communicator. As with an aggressive communicator, remaining calm is crucial, but steer the conversation to a more equal space instead of focusing on their needs. You have to be assertive with your own needs as well.
Conclusion
Overall, communication styles are crucial to forming better relationships within the workplace and in your personal life. It is a great way to identify how you relay your ideas and needs to others. Reflecting on these ideas to ensure clear communication with peers is always beneficial. This blog post helped you identify strategies and ways to steer communication into a healthier and safer space for you!
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